{"id":86,"date":"2022-11-19T21:26:00","date_gmt":"2022-11-19T21:26:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/?p=86"},"modified":"2023-04-15T15:04:29","modified_gmt":"2023-04-15T15:04:29","slug":"is-that-a-large-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/index.php\/2022\/11\/19\/is-that-a-large-one\/","title":{"rendered":"Is That A Large One..?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"684\" src=\"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-1024x684.jpg\" alt=\"A frothy latte in a glass mug sits on a cafe table\" class=\"wp-image-37\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/IMG_4907-scaled-3542614820-e1675541021668-2048x1367.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 767px) 89vw, (max-width: 1000px) 54vw, (max-width: 1071px) 543px, 580px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>On a recent hospital visit, I popped into the coffee shop in the foyer to pick up a drink for my wife on my way up to the ward. As I waited to be served, an elderly lady ahead of me in the queue was attempting to pay for a small pack of biscuits with cash, only to be told that they were still only accepting card payments. \u201cBut I haven\u2019t got a card,\u201d she objected. \u201cI\u2019m sorry but we haven\u2019t got a till for cash,\u201dcame the reply, clearly expecting her to walk away. \u201cBut I\u2019ve been here all day visiting my friend; I haven\u2019t even had any breakfast.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It didn\u2019t appear that any resolution was imminent, so I asked the cashier if the biscuits could be added to my order (this isn\u2019t about me though, there were any number of people behind me in the queue waiting to do the same). At first,  I think the lady thought I was trying to take her biscuits from her, not wanting to have to bother picking up my own, but when she realised what was happening, she smiled and said: \u201cOh, thank you, I\u2019ll have a vanilla latte, that\u2019s terribly kind of you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The cashier looked slightly surprised when I nodded in agreement to the extra order, but then the barista who was by this time steaming the milk for my wife\u2019s drink, said just loudly enough to be heard: \u201cIs that a large one\u2026?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p> A ripple of smirks made it\u2019s way around the shop, and I must admit my naughty side found it hard not to smile at the time. The lady, who didn\u2019t seem to have heard the remark, waited patiently for her drink, then smiled again and said: \u201cWell that\u2019s your good deed done for the day! Thank you, young man.\u201d (I have to say, I\u2019m not often called young man since passing the age of fifty).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Later that evening, as I reflected on the events of the day, a couple of unexpected thoughts cropped up on the subject of asking for and receiving help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Firstly, I\u2019m sure I\u2019m not alone in being able to recall situations in the past where I was I in need of help but anything from embarrassment and awkwardness through to sheer stubbornness prevented me from making the request; in fact I\u2019m sorry to admit I can even think of a time where an unsolicited offer of much-needed help disposing of a large piece of furniture at the local dump was politely refused, resulting in a completely unnecessary muscle strain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In all seriousness though, it\u2019s an important skill not only to be able to identify when you need help with something, but also to go on to actually ask for it, or be able to accept it when offered. The elderly lady in the coffee shop could easily have refused the biscuits, or accepted them but not mentioned a hot drink when clearly she wanted one, but she had the sense to say what she needed; for all I know she might have been facing an exhausting journey home after that long day keeping a sick friend company, but <em>she<\/em> knew what she needed and wasn\u2019t afraid to ask.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Secondly, if you\u2019re prepared to make an offer of help, you should also be prepared to accept that what is needed may not be what you originally thought it would be, and it\u2019s ok for the person to let you know what they <em>do<\/em> actually need; even if you can then only help with some part of it, you may have useful insight into how to tackle the rest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It\u2019s a good idea to keep in mind though, that you never know when you might need that offer of a vanilla latte yourself.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>On a recent hospital visit, I popped into the coffee shop in the foyer to pick up a drink for my wife on my way up to the ward. As I waited to be served, an elderly lady ahead of me in the queue was attempting to pay for a small pack of biscuits with &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/index.php\/2022\/11\/19\/is-that-a-large-one\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Is That A Large One..?&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-86","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-main"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Is That A Large One..? - AJ Major: Web Developer, Outdoor Enthusiast, Dog Lover<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Observations on the art of asking for and accepting help when required\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/ajmajor.co.uk\/index.php\/2022\/11\/19\/is-that-a-large-one\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Is That A Large One..? 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